What it takes to understand a womanizer…

I’ve been on match.com since March and have met a ridiculous amount of guys for a first date. Most people tell me that I’m too picky and that I’m not giving any guy a chance to go on a second date… and they’re right.  I was always comparing the guys with Casanova, that it was becoming impossible for any guy to come close to me.

But I finally realized that my countless dating was not going anywhere…. so I’ve loosened my boundaries and decided not to leave immediately after dinner this time (yes, I’ve been having dinner at nice restaurants, never paid a bill, but always went straight home leaving the guy wondering why I left).  I told this guy that I would go with the flow and follow his lead.  It would be a lie if I said, “I didn’t think that he would take me to his apartment on a first date”, because both men and women wants to be in a romantic moment and have passionate sex in the future. It just depends on how early you want it to happen.

This might sound insincere, but I wanted to see how womanizers are doing this everyday.  How they sleep with different women everyday without any of them noticing that his penis has been entering another girls vagina the day before. So I made myself irresistible for him, and had sex in his gorgeous apartment in downtown San Francisco.  This was my first time that I slept with a guy without feelings….

Next day, he asked me to come over to his place again…. but surprisingly at the same time, Casanova called to see me at his apartment.  This was a perfect test to see if I could have sex with different guy within 24hours…. shockingly, I realized that this was harder than I thought… When Casanova saw my vagina, he immediately said, “you’ve been sleeping with another guy! Your pussy is different!!”.

Casanova was making a face that I’ve never seen before… He was too narcissistic to realize that I could sleep with another guy and was freaking out.  I knew that I could NEVER tell him the truth, so I told the same lies he used to tell me, “you’re crazy! I am not sleeping with anybody else! You’re imagining things. Really messed up!”, and calmed him down.

Casanova eventually inserted his penis in me again saying, “it feels different. Your pussy is different“… but I just made a straight face and kept on lying to his face… This experience has taught me that it’s not hard to lie…. womanizers has no feelings towards these women, so he could say anything he wants and gets away with it…

bed

How hard it is to get over a womanizer…

Womanizers are extremely good in making a woman feel special, and making her believe that she has a future with him.  He’s also very experienced in bed, so he will give her a great pleasurable feeling too. On top of that, Casanova is wealthy, young, tall, good-looking, and he has made the perfect bachelors apartment which attracts desperate women.  When a girl has stayed around him for a while, it’s hard to find a guy who can offer the same level of pleasure that he has provided.  In other words, a woman gets spoiled by Casanova….

I am one of his victim who is trying to find another man who can fulfill my needs.  I receive plenty of emails from guys on match.com and have met a decent amount of men… ALL wealthy guys…

Yesterday, I met another guy from match.com.  Just like Casanova, he was a CEO, BOD, extremely smart, and had money.  Due to his success, it seems that he had no problem finding a woman, but I was not interested. He took me to his luxury apartment that faces the bay bridge (a landmark that is well known in San Francisco Bay Area), decorated by a designer with expensive furnitures… Most girls would jump onto this opportunity, but I kept comparing him with Casanova.

Casanova doesn’t have dark chest or pubic hair, but he shaves it off. His penis was large, but it was definitely making me come every time… After being with a guy who satisfied me in bed too, it’s hard to move on to a guy that doesn’t shave his hair, and has a smaller penis.  Even though my heart was broken by Casanova months ago, I am still haunted by his memories and incapable of accepting a guy who seems to be very interested in me.

Bay Bridge

How he controls women…

Casanova is extremely experienced in womanizing… he knows what women want, and he will use that against us. For a month, he has been asking me to arrange a threesome with one of my friends. He believes that no women would turn down SEX with a sexy and hot guy like himself… (he said so himself).

Casanova is currently redecorating his apartment with new furniture and rugs, telling me that women love to help decorating.  He knows that women want to feel needed or be a part of his life, so he will chose the furniture himself, but makes sure that his WOMEN are involved by saying, “OUR walls, YOUR bathroom, WE could…, what do YOU think?“. He will take these women to shop with him, buy the pieces himself, but will make the women do the work at home… If people saw what he was doing, these girls are NOT treated like girlfriends but rather a SERVANT.   I know all of this, because I was at his place 2 nights last week.  It’s come to a point where I can see what these women has been doing in his apartment, and how women are manipulated by Casanova. There’s so much evidence left behind that I can’t believe how blind and naive they really are. They leave behind things because they each believe that she’s the ONLY woman entering his apartment.  When Casanova hides their “stuff” left behind, he probably says to them when they come over the next time, “my family and friends came, so I had to move your things”… he used to say that to me too before I found out about his womanizing.

lubricant

Casanova is a successful businessman and there is hardly any woman who could compete against his talent.  He will get her involved in his business so that she would feel like he’s there for a long term relationship.  What they ALL forget, is that he’s the BOSS….. he can easily get rid of her if he wanted to.

How I came across another player…

Ever since I found out about Casanova’s womanizing, I’ve been researching on this topic. Fortunately I had not dated a player before Casanova, so this has been a hurtful experience, but has definitely turned into a learning experience. Though my heart was once stolen by Casanova, I have been on a journey trying to find the true “gentleman”, who will be loyal and honest with me. I’ve listed myself on online dating sites like Match.com and OKCupid, and also been to several speed dating events. I’ve been on countless dates since March, but no guy has gotten a second date with me….

Last week, I met with a guy from match.com. We didn’t exchange much information before the meeting but as he walked toward me, I knew he was not the relationship type guy. In fact when he greeted me, I could smell that he’s another player… The way that he was extremely comfortable with women and how he touched me while talking to me, was so different from most guys in San Francisco bay area. This area is unique as most people are in the high-tech industry and usually quite shy…

As he sat down next to me, all I was thinking was “how do I get him to confess”… Pick up artists make it pretty obvious that he is there for a one night stand, but players will try to hide their true intentions and tries to approach me with sincerity. It took me about an hour for him to confess that he is a player and that he is having relationship with several women.  He told me how much he likes to pleasure women, and can’t be in a monogamous relationship.  Well, I’m glad that I spotted a player and that he opened up, or otherwise I would have wasted another couple of months…

=== ATTENTION ===

I read on another person’s blog that Match.com is mostly for one-night-stands. In addition, I’ve already met several players from the site, so be aware that womanizers does exist on online dating sites.

Casanova has been trying for 2 weeks now to get me into a threesome and keeps asking me to bring a friend to his place… It all started from my stupidity of asking about his sexual fantasy 3 weeks ago and he replied immediately “threesome with you“.  Last week, he tried so many times to convince me and made himself available on a weekend. I had already made plans for the weekend weeks before with my girlfriends, so I wasn’t going to spare my time for a womanizer… If he had been a loyal boyfriend I would have tried to see him, but why should I try to meet a womanizer’s needs? He is a selfish person who only LOVES himself and cheats on ALL of his women.

threesome

Casanova is a successful businessman who is only 31 years old, 6’4″ tall, handsome and muscular. I have no doubt that there hasn’t been a woman who has turned him down like I have. So it wasn’t a surprise that he got angry when I kept choosing my girlfriends over him. He started to text me things like;

” 😦 ur being stupid”

” 😦 You are being messed up”

“It bothers me…that you didn’t see me and bring friends this weekend… you shouldn’t not see me because of a girl hangout… really messed up”

“please think about how ur treating me…”

“U should have seen me… upset is not what I get. It’s rude that u didn’t see me. I asked u several times and u also are being annoying. “

“U need to make this up to me. messed up.” 

His words were selfish with no respect towards me. It’s so obvious that he wasn’t thinking about how he chose to be a womanizer over a relationship with me. If he cared for me, he would have given me reassurance, or talked to me about how a threesome would benefit me too…

He probably has about 8-10 women who thinks that he’s a boyfriend, while he is actively dating women from match.com making them also believe that he wants a wife. He even said to me yesterday “I feel helpless…and lost without you”

How he asked for a threesome…

I don’t exactly remember when but about 4-5 months ago, Casanova popped the question, “want to have threesome sometime? Would u want to watch another girl suck my Cock and then I fuck you while she watches?”.  I’m not sure whether this is true, but I hear that guys fantasize about threesomes.  So I replied to him, “If it’s your dream to have 2 women in bed, then it’s my dream to have 2 guys”.

I had forgotten about having that conversation until the other day when we were having sex, I asked him of his sexual fantasy.  Without giving a thought he replied, “Want to try a threesome with you”.  Casanova had not even tried anal sex with me but he wanted to try a threesome?!  Obviously I wasn’t understanding his philosophy and was confused…

Couple of days later he texted me, “When r u going to setup this threesome?”.  Because I had asked him of his fantasy, he was hoping that I would fulfill his wish.  I’m a person who is willing to try new things since I never know if I’ld like it until I tried it.  So I wasn’t against a threesome, but only if I’m the one who gets to play with the couple.  Though Casanova is a womanizer that I was once in love with, I wasn’t ready to face his penis entering another woman’s vagina.  I don’t even want to imagine Casanova having sex with another woman, so there was no way that I could watch the act in front of me.

Casanova tried to persuade me for 5 days to get one of my girl friends to join us for a threesome.  For a guy who always tells me, “I’m very busy. Trying to manage a lot here”, sure is taking a lot of time trying to manipulate me into threesome, and also making himself available for the play.  No matter how I explained him that no friend would want to watch me have sex, and that it would only make my friend uncomfortable, Casanova wasn’t convinced.  He would say, “tell them I have big cock and am very sexy and we could hangout— I have nice place, Jacuzzi etc….. come on… tell them details and they will want to.  Should be easy for you to get a friend to hangout with us… just tell them how sexy I am.  –they want to be with hot guy too right?!”.

I honestly didn’t know how to approach a friend even if I agreed to have threesome with Casanova.  But he told me to say, “we met at speed dating– he is very romantic and affectionate… I like playing with him- he is sooo sexy and hot… he’s really a hunk… I think I should share him a bit… he likes sex a lot… and is a purist– kind of traditional– very strong and masculine– sensual.. he has two residence, his Foster place is where he usually is.  He drives Porsche Turbo SUV and has nice place with Jacuzzi/steam rooms and likes to hang out in them… he’s never been with two girls… Tell them that I make u com a lot”.

Narcissist

Do you see how narcissistic he is?!  The words written above ALL came from Casanova’s mouth… he was being selfish and was not understanding the fact that it would be STRANGE for my friend to get in a sexual activity with me unless she was bi-sexual or a lesbian.  It doesn’t matter how good he looked or how much money he had, it was just unethical.

What also bothered me was that he believes that he is a “purist”.  He’s been saying that to me so many times since I first met him, but then he disguises as a gentleman and deceives all women about commitment and love?  He is hiding the truth behind these women because he knows that it’s unacceptable…. So what makes him think that he is a purist?  If he really believed his philosophy was correct, he shouldn’t have to lie about his life as a lady killer.

How I’m still played by the womanizer…

Dealing with a womanizer is one problem, but him being extremely narcissistic is another big problem. Worst of all, the fact that I’m still sleeping with him is only making my love life a mess.  I enjoy having sex with him so much, that I can’t resist his existence.  And Casanova of course is smart enough to take advantage of a girl like me, so he keeps me on a leash…

For about a week, Casanova has been asking whether I’m available to meet. Yesterday I finally went to see him in his apartment, only to be reminded of the many women he’s currently seeing.  Too many evidences were left behind…different hair, lipstick on the towel, food she’s cooked, places she’s cleaned… I met Casanova over a year ago, but probably know about Casanova than any other women that he’s sleeping with. I know his personality and style, when Casanova dresses up for a date, or when he is texting his girls/victims when I’m right next to him.  Casanova doesn’t talk about his other girls, but whenever I mention about the evidences that I find, he doesn’t deny and would say, “don’t tell me about it”. 

Casanova is juggling with so many women, that it has become natural for him to lie. He still says to me “I love you”, “It’s good to see you in my apartment”, “Honey… babe…I want to move closer to you”.  Knowing that Casanova is lying, I simply ignore because it’s a waste of time trying to correct him.

Casanova is an overly narcissistic person who is arrogant, needs constant admiration and positive reinforcement, fantasizing about success and attractiveness… which on the other hand could say that he is easily insulted, and have fragile self esteem… Every time I have sex with Casanova, he would ask me the same question, “I’m I the best fuck you’ve had?”

womanizer

In order to get myself away from Casanova, I went on a speed dating event for the 4th time… 16 men / 16 women attended, and I was NOT impressed with any of the guys that I met… But I won’t give up. I’ll just keep on dating until I find the right guy for me 🙂

How naive women could be…

When I first had sex with Casanova last year, he had a whole box of extra-large condoms.  I am ashamed to say this, but I’ve only used a condom few times in the past… In those few times, the guys had put the condom on himself.

Casanova first asked me to put it on for him… but I had to tell him the truth that I’ve never done that before. Casanova took me by surprise, and said that he always had the women do it for him, so he can’t do it himself. Now I know that was a lie, but then, I felt so inexperienced and shocked.

From there, we tried to use the condom 5-6 times but couldn’t. Then eventually gave up and have not been using a condom ever since. At that time, I thought that I was the only one sleeping with him, so if I got pregnant, I was ready to face it.

magnumxl

Five months later, I found an opened/used “emergency contraceptive” box in his apartment. This is when I found out that Casanova had been sleeping with other women. When I realized that he was in fact sleeping with multiple women, I tried to confront Casanova, but he said to me “I’m not. You’re imagining things! Do you see any condoms lying around?”

I’m guessing that Casanova has slept with over 40 women since I found out about his womanizing in January, and never found a condom in his apartment. I know Casanova well enough to say that he can’t hide stuff well or doesn’t throw the garbage out himself. So I am sure that he is NOT using a condom.

Though Casanova cleans himself, it’s disgusting to think that his penis is entering different vagina everyday (even 2 different women per day).  What’s more disgusting is that, all these women are so naive and don’t doubt that Casanova is playing with her.

After I found out about his womanizing, I realized that Casanova was too good for me.  He was only 31 years old, had money, extremely smart and talented, tall and handsome, great sex… Why would he ever want to settle when there are so many women out there that he could have sex with. It took me over 5 months to realize that I was NAIVE